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Mothers Day

Posted in Not recorded, tagged , , , , , , , on May 8, 2011| 11 Comments »

Blog post by Reed from Washington, DC

Lenora "Ann" Reed Sandridge 10/17/43-12/15/06

A couple of days ago I sat down to brainstorm about the subject of my blog post for today.  As I have been focusing on volunteering with my posts, I thought I would highlight a national nonprofit that gave opportunities for mothers to volunteer.  To my surprise, I couldn’t find such an organization with the exception of very focused groups like Mothers Against Drunk Driving.  Then I thought I would focus on organizations that helped mothers.  I found lots of groups that help pregnant moms, new mothers, single parent mothers, etc.  But somehow I wasn’t finding anything that really grabbed me.

So I decided to dedicate today’s blog to my own mother who was one of my inspirations in creating the Year of Giving.

Born Lenora Ann Reed in 1943, my mother grew up in the sleepy coal-mining town of Richlands, Virginia.  It’s a beautiful part of the country.  I can remember driving down Route 460 as a child, well I wasn’t driving, but I was in the car, and seeing the breathtaking vistas of the Blue Ridge Mountains.

My mother's childhood house and shed. The outhouse she used is long gone, but it still looks more or less the same structurally - except the deck. (Photo: Reed)

The house she grew up in still stands on a steep slope overlooking the town.  Today nearly 6,000 people live in Richlands compared to about 4,800 when my mother was a child.  Not too much has changed in my mind.  The King Kone ice cream and hot dog stand still gets people lined up two or three deep.  Mom used to love their chili dogs.  I went back last year with my dad and got one.  They must have been better back in the day.

Graduation from Richlands High School, 1960

Mom graduated from Richlands High School in 1960.  She followed the footsteps of her older sisters and went to nursing school, however, nursing wasn’t for her and she ended up working for the federal government in Washington, DC.

She was living with my uncle Jack on the fourth floor of a crimson colored brick apartment complex in Arlington,VA. The place is still there today in fact.  In the summer of 1962 my dad was moving in across the hall.  “There were some girls who were whistling and giggling at me as I was carrying things in,” he told me smiling.  “They kept hiding though when I would try to see who it was.”  Well, the rest is history as they say.

Jerry and Lenora were married on January 23, 1964.  They packed up the car and drove to California, sold everything except what they could carry in some suitcases and started out on a trip around the world.  The first stop was Honolulu.  They figured they would work for a while there until they had enough money to move on to the South Pacific.  They never made it any further and five years later left the tropical paradise of Don Ho and moved to California where my brother and I were born.

My mother and brother playing with my Uncle Jack's dog Spike in 1973. (photo: Reed)

The next 20 years were spent raising us kids.  Although we had a baby sitter when we would get home from school, they rarely left us with a sitter to go out to dinner or those kinds of things.  They completely put their social lives on hold in order to spend time with us.  Our house was full of love and laughter and a few screams of my brother and me fighting.

Mom was extremely generous.  We didn’t have much money to give, but she was always thinking of others before herself.  She searched voraciously to find the perfect card to send to her friends and family.  She wrote beautiful kind letters.  She led by example; instilling in my brother and me virtues of kindness, sympathy and honesty.

When I was 16 I was selected to be a Rotary Youth Exchange Student and went to Guasave, Mexico for my 11th grade year of high school.  On the eve of my flight, we sat in a hotel outside of Baltimore, MD fearing the unknown of a year apart.  Tears were flowing and my mother took me for a short walk outside our hotel.  She told me something that I will never forget.

My brother Ryan, Mom, Dad, Me in Ireland

“All my life I have worked to help you become independent.  You’ve grown up so much and are setting out to write a new chapter of your life.  We shouldn’t be crying; we should be celebrating.  This is what your father and I have dreamed of ever since you were born is to see you mature and develop into your own person.”

I think we both knew that I still had a lot of growing up to do but as always she had a way with words to make the pain or the sadness go away.  I must have received at least 100 letters from her during my 11 months in Mexico.

Mom died on the morning of December 15th, 2006 from some complications from a by-pass surgery she underwent a few days earlier.  She had battled heart disease for more than two decades since having her first heart attack days before Christmas in 1984.  It’s somehow ironic that someone with such a big and loving heart would die of heart related illness.

Me and mom in Rio de Janeiro in 2003.

Today I remember her.  I remember her smile, her laughter, her listening, her dancing with my dad in the kitchen, her gentle touch, her love of books, her love for family, her fondness for her work and coworkers and most of all her hugs.  I celebrate her life and the beauty she brought to the lives of so many others.

If you are able to spend the day with your mother, make sure you tell her that you love her and appreciate all that she has done for you.  Hug her and hold her an extra moment while you remember all of those who have lost their mothers.

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Day 362 – Jen B.

Posted in Something for others, tagged , , , , , , , , , on December 29, 2010| 6 Comments »

Today marks the first day of giving for our newest Kindness Investor from Seattle: Petra.   I spoke to another future Kindness Investor earlier this week.  His name is Michael B. from Connecticut and he will start his week of kindness investing on January 5th.  Slowly I am getting people to join this movement; a seven-day, seventy dollar investment that has the power to change an unemployed person’s perspective on life through kindness.  If you or someone you know are out of work and want an opportunity of a lifetime, drop me a line.

Today’s recipient is one whose story touched me tremendously.  I was in Manassas, VA visiting my good friends Thomas and Tressa.  It was their beautiful baby girl Tegan’s first birthday.  Well, I guess she already had a birthday last year…a real birth day…anyway she turned one!  While I was there I met a friend of theirs named Jen who teaches at the same school where Tressa teaches.  I decided to give her my $10.

Our conversation was quite typical at first.  We talked about her job as a high school biology teacher.  I learned about her experience volunteering in Ghana with an ophthalmologist.  “I did eye exams and distributed glasses to local communities,” she explained.  “It completely inspired me!”  It inspired her to pursue other dreams and that is why next year this 30-year-old Pittston, PA native will leave her lesson plans on photosynthesis and Mendel’s heredity research for a new career in medicine.

It’s not a surprise that Jen is going back to school when you learn that she is the faculty member that overseas homecoming, student council, prom, quiz team, etc.  Yep, she’s definitely an overachiever.  My friends tell me that she is a karaoke wiz too!  “I know the lyrics to just about any song from the late 80s and early 90s,” she says beaming.

Then I asked a question that completely changed our carefree conversation, “Are you married, do you have kids?” I asked.  There was a brief silence and she responded that she was a widow.  I offered my condolences and she explained that her husband, Army 1st Lt. Todd J. Bryant, was killed on October 31st of 2003 in Fallujah, Iraq when an improvised explosive device (IED) hit his Humvee.  The 23-year-old was assigned to Company C, 1st Battalion, 34th Armor Regiment, 1st Infantry Division at Fort Riley, Kansas.  A graduate of West Point Military Academy, Todd’s death came just 52 days after being deployed or as Jen put it to a journalist once, “55 letters later.”  “And we were married just ten days before he deployed,” she told me managing to keep her composure.

She shared with me the moment that she learned the news.  “I was teaching at my school,” she began to say, “when I was visited by an Army general and chaplain…”

I was speechless.  I just wanted to give her a big hug.  In a matter of minutes I felt like I knew Jen for years rather than the handful of minutes we had actually spent talking to each other.  And although I never met Todd, I can assure you that he was nothing less than extraordinary.

I have to be honest I couldn’t stop thinking about Todd when I got home later that evening.  I had so many questions and turned to the Internet to find out more.  He quickly becomes more than a casualty of war but a bright young man who liked In-n-Out burgers and making people laugh, who dreamed of raising a family with his soul mate and pursuing a career in government where he could effect real change in our country.  He was a husband, a son, a brother and a friend.  He would have been my friend.

There were also comments from those who never knew Todd but reached out to pay their respects to a family that understood the meaning of  service.  Todd’s parents were former military officers and his brother Tim is currently a Lt. Col in the U.S. Marine Corps serving in the Marine Expeditionary Unit  and sister Tiffany, a 2000 graduate of West Point herself, served as a Captain in the Army before becoming a teacher.

You’ll even find a hard to put down book entitled In the Time of War by Bill Murphy, Jr. that focuses on Todd and his fellow graduating class from West Point.  I got the book and have read several chapters already.   It has several heartfelt excerpts of letters that Jen wrote to her husband and Todd’s farewell letter to Jen.  I can’t remember the last time I cried from reading a book.

It was fitting I thought that she decided to use the ten dollars to buy items for a care package that the student council members at her school were preparing to send to troops stationed overseas for the holidays.

Todd J. Bryant 1/14/80 - 10/31/03

We live far away from places like Fallujah, Iraq and Helmand Province, Afghanistan and sometimes we take for granted the sacrifices our brothers and sisters in uniform make for us.  I dedicate this blog post to the memory of Todd Bryant and encourage you to take a moment of silence right now and pay your respects to Todd and all of those who have lost their lives serving their respective countries.

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Day 150 – Kylie S.

Posted in Gave the money to someone else, tagged , , , , , , , , , on May 18, 2010| 5 Comments »

Have you ever wondered how your life would have turned out if you had dropped out of school your freshman year of high school?  Well today’s recipient Kylie knows the answer to that question first-hand.  She did it.

Kylie in front of the fountain at Dupont Circle (Photo: Reed)

Kylie, who turned 21 on Friday, decided half way through her freshman year of high school that she didn’t want to go any more.  Probably we have all thought about dropping out, but she actually did it.  Then she visited three or four other schools to see if she liked them any more, but didn’t find what she was looking for.  She tried home schooling for a while, but that didn’t work out either.  So what did she do?  She says she ended up hanging out with some friends that were freshmen at a Delaware college.  They too were not going to class much either.  She “experimented with lots of things” she said and wound up finding herself.  She discovered that she really liked to write.

Today, she is taking classes at American University and hopes to open creative writing centers in youth correctional facilities.  She has already started the process but has a way to go to launch her first center.

I asked Kylie to describe herself and she said, “I am empathetic to a fault.  I’m maybe a little lost…but definitely passionate.” I felt her passion when we spoke about our mothers.  “I love her more than anything,” she said about her mother.  She asked about my mother and I shared with her what a wonderful person my mother was.  She started to cry.  “I don’t know what I would do if I lost my mom” she said fighting away a tear.

Photo: Reed

I was interested in Kylie’s tattoos.  She has seven “professional” tattoos and one “prison” tattoo.  I call it a “prison” tattoo because it was one that a friend did with a BIC pen.  Ouch!  That one didn’t look so good either.  On her right arm she has a large tattoo that says “Love Killer.”  It hurts me just to look at it as I imagine the tattoo needle hammering into the veins that ran along her forearm.  She got this tattoo because of an ex-boyfriend she had.  She shared with me the details of a couple of past relationships.  “Who was the Love Killer,” I asked.  “Maybe I was” she answered.  

Something she said about two former boyfriends stayed with me.  “The one guy I loved, but I never told him that I loved him.  The other one I never loved, but I told him that I did.”  Ironic isn’t it.  “I sometimes regret not telling him that I loved him.”  I asked her if she thought that things would have ended up different if she had told him that she loved him and she shook her head to tell me “no.”  “In that case” I said, “it doesn’t really matter, does it?”

Kylie told me that she was going to give the $10 to somebody else.  As for ways that you can help Kylie, she said she would give that some thought and see if she came up with something.

Photo: Reed

We were heading in the same direction, so we walked through Dupont Circle and headed toward the Metro entrance.  On the way over we passed a woman sitting on a crate panhandling.  Kylie pulled the $10 out of her pocket and dropped it in the woman’s bucket and kept on walking.  “I had to get rid of it!  I didn’t want to be tempted to spend it.”  I sneaked a peak back at the woman…her face was pleasantly shocked.

Happy 21st birthday Kylie!

By the way, check out what Start from Day 126 did with the $10 I gave him…he posted his experience today on his website!

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Day 126 – Start L.

Posted in Gave the money to someone else, tagged , , , , , , , , , on April 23, 2010| 18 Comments »

I am kind of bummed today.  I have been using a large SLR camera to take pictures for my Website.  Sometimes though it is not convenient to carry such a large item around and my back has been having some issues with carrying around all of this gear everywhere I go.  How do parents do it?!  

Anyway, I own a small digital camera, a Canon PowerShot SD400, however, I haven’t been using it because the battery wasn’t staying charged for more than a minute or two.  So, I broke down and bought the $40 battery (a good one so it wouldn’t die in a few months).  It arrived yesterday and I took it with me last evening to try it out.  It worked fine.  Today I took the camera out to use it and the display is all messed up.  It’s as if I dropped it or got water in it, but I didn’t.  It’s really weird.  If anyone knows what might be wrong with it, I would love to hear from you.  I shouldn’t let it get to me, I don’t really need it anyway. 

I think today’s recipient would probably agree with that statement.  He goes by the name Start Loving. 

Those of you who have been to Washington, DC  have probably visited this place right? 

White House

But how many of you have visited this place? 

Start Loving at the Anti-Nuclear Peace Vigil (Photo: Reed)

Well it’s right in front of the White House.  The Anti Nuclear Peace Vigil was started in 1981 by Concepción and Thomas.  Sadly Thomas passed away last year and now Start has taken his place.  It’s hard for me to fully comprehend that when Concepción and Thomas started the vigil I was only seven!  

As I approached Start he greeted me, “Hello friend!”  He was seated in a low chair with a laptop literally on his lap with a WiFi card plugged in giving him Internet access.  I plopped down on the sidewalk next to him and we talked for about an hour.  I asked him why he was doing this and he cleverly responded, “Because I’m too greedy to do anything else.”  I told Start that I did not get too involved with political issues.  Start shared an analogy for why I should be more active that went something like this.  “Imagine you come home to find your house engulfed in flames and your loved ones and your worldly possessions trapped inside.  Wouldn’t you do everything in your power to save your loved ones and put that fire out?  Well our planet is on fire!”  

Check out this video of me talking to Start.  I think you will be shocked to learn about the life Start left behind to follow his heart. 

You might disagree with some of his views, but what is unquestionable is his conviction and passion.  

Start Loving (Photo: Reed)

In case you are wondering, yes the tattoos on his face are real.  Did you try to stop the video and enlarge it to read what they said?  Well, I will save you the work.  From left to right on his forehea are: “STOP STARVING” ‘START LOVING” “STOP KILLING.”  Below that it reads “WAGE LOVE OR DIE.” 

You can visit Start’s Facebook Page and the Anti-Nuclear Peace Vigil website to find out some of the specific items that he feels are in desperate need of immediate action. 

Here is something that I took from his page: 

MY RELIGION (same as Jesus, King, Gandhi, Teresa, Romero, Eleanor, Obamas…): Universal Love. 

PEACE:  is the presence of Universal Love. 

WAR: HOSTILITY is the presence of Conditional Love. 

MY FAMILY (same as Jesus, King, Gandhi, Teresa, Romero, Eleanor…): All people born and unborn. 

QUOTE: “The greatest madness of all is to see things as they are, and not as they should be.” Cervantes, Man of La Mancha. 

It was such a pleasure to have the opportunity to speak with him.  “Millions of people visit the White House every year, but only a few come over here to visit,” Start tells me.  I encourage everyone to stop by and talk to Start.  If you are near the White House between 6am-10:30am and most evenings from 7pm-10pm (sometimes he is not there in the evening when he delivers bread to local shelters) stop by and talk with Start.  Concepción, who I didn’t meet, is usually at the vigil other times.  Sometimes when neither can be there a friend will man the vigil. 

Start is going to give the $10 to a hero of humanity.  Maybe someone doing a hunger strike.  I asked him if I could help him with anything on the Lend a Hand page.  He said he couldn’t think of anything, not even a new pair of shoes to replace his sandals that are held together with tape.  He later did think of something.  He said that Concepción needs a working laptop to use for email and Internet browsing.  If someone has a computer please reach out to me or Start. 

I asked Start if he would do this for the rest of his life.  “I will, unless I find something that benefits humanity more than this.”  He gave me a big hug and we shook hands and I walked home.

UPDATE: May 17, 2010

Start shared his experience giving my $10 away on his blog today!

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Day 108 – Donna and John

Posted in Unknown, tagged , , , , , , , , on April 9, 2010| 8 Comments »

Tidal Basin (Photo: Reed)

Last Thursday was April Fool’s Day.  I decided to do the tourist thing here in DC and check out the cherry blossom mania down by the Tidal Basin.  I took my camera down there and pretended to know what I was doing.  I got a couple of shots…but I am still learning a lot about how to fully use my camera to take better photographs.

Photo courtesy of Donna and John

Anyway, as I was walking around I was asked to take a photo of a young couple, Donna and John.  I obliged and then asked them to accept my $10.  John’s reaction was amazing.  He was the first person who I have approached about receiving my $10 who actually knew about the Year of Giving.  He said he read about it I think on Yahoo! News.  Looking back on it I might have taken advantage of the April Fool’s date and said, “Hah!  I’m not that guy giving $10!  April Fools!”  But I wasn’t that quick-witted to deliver such a line.

Me with Donna and John (Photo: Kimon Kanelakis)

I’m glad I didn’t do that because then I wouldn’t have learned what a great couple they are.  John works for the government and Donna is studying hearing and speech science.  She wants to eventually work in audiology and do newborn hearing screenings.  In fact if anyone knows anyone else who is in this field in the DC area and might perhaps be a good contact for Donna, she would really appreciate your help.  She hopes to get an internship or job this summer doing newborn screening.

Check out this video of the cherry blossoms and a brief interview with Donna and John.  They have a great story about finding love amidst struggling economic times after the subprime mortgage crisis.  They are not sure what they will do with the $10 yet, but as you will see in the clip, they agreed to update us once they have decided.

On a separate note, I updated the Statistics page…sorry that was pretty outdated.  Average age has stayed pretty consistent and so did the number one answer for where the money will go: “Food & Beverage”.  “Gave the Money to Someone Else” has become the second most common response, replacing “Transportation.”

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